But why? Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we continue to let those...
But why? Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we continue to let those people back in, the ones who bring us unholiness and pain. I'll tell you why, when it comes to romantic relationships we either THINK we love them or we actually do. How do you differentiate between loving someone and just being comfortable and content?
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If you find yourself unhappy more than not around that person, chances are you are just comfortable and content.
Now when it comes to family members or friends, that is a different situation. We long to feel accepted and loved. We long for people to want and need us.
How many times have you let a best friend back into your life after they continuously wronged you? Why do this? It took me a very long time to figure out that there is no good in surrounding myself with friends that constantly back stabbed, hurt, gossiped and betrayed me. Have you ever done this? Is it because you are afraid of being alone, or that you are in need of social acceptance?
I have come to the conclusion that we all want to believe people are inherently good. That no matter what wrong people do to us, they can always change.
There we go making excuses again. I absolutely hate to break it to you but
There are some people that will continue to hurt you until they have completely wrecked you, changed you and molded you into who they want you to be.
This is true about romantic relationships and friendships.
You may ask, how can I avoid doing this?
Learn to love yourself, know who you are and what you believe so that when you encounter people like this you will not be shaken.
Letting those people who hurt us back into our lives is viewed by some people as strong or forgiving when in actuality it's weakness.
People change. Sometimes it's hard for us to believe that our loved ones have turned into completely different people. Everything and everyone is constantly changing, either for the better or for the worse. I thoroughly hate change, I always have; it hurts and it's uncomfortable. I have learned that we all must adapt, adjust and roll with the punches because people are always going to let us down but how we handle those situations says a lot about our character. Historically, I haven't dealt very well with people changing, but every relationship is a stepping stone to becoming more wise.
There does come a point when you have to weigh out the pros an cons of letting people in.
You are worthy. Your time is valuable and no one deserves your time of day if all they do is continuously cause you pain.
Dont make excuses for them either.
They are just going through a hard time.
They really need me right now.
He/She only said those mean things because they had a bad day.
He/She won't open up because of being hurt in the passed."
Last but certainly not least, the ultimate excuse we use.
Its actually kind of my fault.
Now, sometimes it might actually be our fault, no one is perfect. But don't lie to yourself if it's actually not your fault.
Trying to figure out which relationships are actually worth our time, is quite exhausting.Relationships are work. They aren't just filled with unicorns and rainbows. There are going to be times when you just want to give up, but true love doesn't give up. There has to be a balance of work in the relationship. If only one person is putting in all the effort trying to maintain a Christ-Like, healthy, fun relationship chances are you aren't going to have a successful relationship.
Knowing deep down someone doesn't need to be in our lives makes it harder to let go. Letting go of those people we once couldn't imagine life without, hurts, but in the end it will only make you stronger. I am a firm believer in that every person we meet, care about, love, or befriend, each come in our lives for a reason. Some are meant to be permanent while others are only temporary. I encourage you to think about the people you surround yourself with. Are they good friends? Do they pour into your life the way you do theirs? Do they love you the way you love them? Are they toxic? Are they manipulative?
Be real with yourself, love yourself. Quit making excuses and choose wisely whom you surround yourself with. I've had to, and it hurts. But when I am weak, then I am strong.
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Posted in Dentistry Post Date 04/17/2018